Don't Be a Stooge

Last night, my brother brought this disturbing bit of news to my attention.  Apparently the world will be graced with a Three Stooges movie in 2012.  If that's not a sign of the Apocalypse I don't know what is. What's that you say?  The release date is December 22?!  Oh, no, wait ... I made that up.

But, it gets better.  Are you ready for this?  I don't think you are, but I'm going to tell you anyway.  Apparently, Sean Hayes has been tapped to play Larry.  That's right, Sean Hayes.  You know, the super gay friend from Will and Grace?  Yeah.  That Sean Hayes.  As Larry.  Let that sink in for a bit.  Are you where I am yet?  Seriously Hollywood, what are you thinking?  Hayes is a great actor, and a hilarious comedic performer, but as Larry?  No no no no no.  It's a crime against nature!

Now, Shane and I decided that a comedian named Steven Wright would be better suited in appearance for the role, but we're not sure his delivery is on par.  He's a pretty monotone/sarcastic comedian (which I think is part of his brilliance) but that may not translate well to the slapstick-style comedy The Three Stooges demands.  In fact, this was the most smiley picture I could find of him.  He's certainly got the ridiculous hair down though.

So, based on the choice of Hayes, who would play Curly and Moe?  How about Eric Stonestreet (Modern Family - Cameron Tucker) for Curly and Justin Bieber pre-haircut/makeover for Moe?  Oh God, I can't even say that with a straight face.  Who knows where this train wreck will go.

Personally, this kind of crap irritates me.  What ever happened to having a new idea?  What is so wrong with coming up with something fresh?  With all the sequels and remakes coming out, the original movies are becoming more rare, and I don't like that trend one bit.  If something was great the first time, why do folks in Hollywood think it can be better the second time?  Movies like Tron are the exception to the rule for me.  I mean, today's technology took that film to a whole new level of awesomeness.  But, look at Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.  I love Johnny Depp as much as the next person, but there was no need to redo that film.  It was excellent the first time around.  Let it go.  Why can't we let The Three Stooges rest in peace and enjoy them in their ORIGINAL glory?

I think I'm siding with Sean Tyler on this one and boycotting this film entirely.  Anyone with me?

(Source of Sean Hayes Image: http://www.starpulse.com/Actors/Hayes,_Sean/gallery/TWW-001894/
Source of Larry Image: http://stoogeworld.com/_Biographies/Larry.htm
Source of Steven Write Image: http://www.inn-entertainment.com/cat_comedy.htm)